The Hookup Guide Hookup Tips: How to Write Your First Message on a Hookup Site
Hookup Tips

How to Write Your First Message on a Hookup Site

So you're on a hookup site and you've found the perfect woman and you want to get laid, but you don't want to mess it up by saying the wrong thing? It's no lie that women expect more than just, "hey" or "how's it going" from an opening line online. There are expectations to be met to show us that you're actually looking at our profile and not just messaging every woman on the site. So follow these guidelines to send the perfect message to hookup with your perfect woman.

It doesn't matter the scene, online or in real life, making a good first impression can be make or break for whether or not a relationship will happen. Online it can be even harder to correct a bad first impression because it is so easy for a woman to simply delete your message and forget all about you if they don't like it. But don't worry, it's actually very easy to write an attention grabbing first message to someone you're into on a hookup dating site.

When you've found someone you want to message the first, and most important, thing is to actually read their profile and look at all of their pictures. Find something on their profile or in their pictures that you can use as part of your message and keep it in mind when you start writing. You want to show them that you can relate to them and that you actually took the time to read their profile. Trust me, we really appreciate it.

Next, when you actually start writing, you want to aim for a good 5-6 sentences. Too short will seem generic and too long will seem needy. Take your time with it and show respect. That doesn't mean fill it with fancy words or deep thoughts, that just means to take your time and actually spell out words instead of using abbreviations and put effort into your message. We get so many messages that are just, "hey there" or "how's it going?" (which we hate) so if you give us a well thought out message you're going to be miles above most other guys.

Introduce yourself in your message and mention a little about yourself. If you don't feel comfortable telling them what you do for a living, then don't worry about that. On hookup sites that rarely matters anyways. Find a way to relate yourself to something you saw on their profile like if you saw a picture of them hiking, ask them what trail it was and say that you like it too. Even if you're just trying to get laid, having things in common will peak interests and make you seem more compatible.

Avoid using nicknames like 'baby' or 'sexy'. In a first message they can really come off as creepy and over eager. Be respectful. Don't even message their looks because she's heard that from every other guy. Show her you like her and are different from all the other guys on the hookup site and she will be more interested in responding to your message. Be mature and confident and your chances will be even higher. For learn more about what not to say, see my previous article, 4 Things You Should Never Say to a Woman.

Also, I think it's always good to end with a question. Give them a reason to respond to you.

The last thing to do is to read your message again before sending it. Fix any spelling mistakes and make sure it doesn't sound off. When you're done, send it. I know, this all sounds like a lot of work, but trust me, it will be worth it.

The next time you find someone that you want to message on a hookup dating site don't waste your time by sending them a message that will be ignored. Send them a first message using these guidelines and it will get them interested in you.


Related article: How to Create Your Dating Profile Specifically for Hooking Up

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